The 3rd time’s a charm, right? Well, not for me!
On July 10, 2007 I had my 3rd positive pregnancy test in 8 months.
For 18 days I was hopeful, but scared. I didn’t lift anything heavy for fear of causing a miscarriage. I immediately stopped drinking caffeine. I did anything I could think of to keep this baby alive.
However, on July 29th, I realized that I had lost this baby too.
I couldn’t believe it! So many questions were going through my mind. Why is this happening? What am I doing wrong? How do I fix this? Will I ever be able to have more children?
I started to ask my doctor these questions. I was told that they don’t really start looking for any medical issues until someone has had 4 or 5 miscarriages. WHAT? So I needed to go through this emotionally draining experience again before they will start to look for a cause? I was frustrated to say the least!
I was under a lot of stress at work and I wondered if that could be affecting my ability to carry a baby to term. My husband and I started talking about the possibility of me switching from full time work to part time and what that would mean for our family and our finances.
Our son, who was 3 1/2 at the time, had been in daycare since he was 11 weeks old. With the thought that he might be our only child bouncing around in my head, I realized that I didn’t want to miss out on any more time with him. I wanted to enjoy his early years without the stress of work always hanging over me.
My husband and I decided that it would be best if I stepped down from my position as vice-president. In September I started working 3 days a week and it’s one of the best decisions I’ve ever made! I enjoyed that extra time with my son more than I thought I would.
The pain of my miscarriages was still there and I still feel it to this day, but that pain helped me to appreciate the miracle that my son is and no matter how crazy he makes me, I am grateful for him every single day.
Here are the first 3 posts in this series.
If you are going through the heartbreak of miscarriage and would like to chat with someone who knows what you are going through, please leave your email address in the comments and I will contact you.